Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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