summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize