I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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