I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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