If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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