all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Randomize
