I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
