So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
