im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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