..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
