dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize