I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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