I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize