Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
