too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
