There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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