I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
People in love make me want to vomit
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
a search helicopter?!
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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