Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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