Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i think i have two assholes
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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