so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
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