so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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