so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Randomize