i permit you to call me
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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