You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize