put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
