Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
