He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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