A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize