I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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