You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
