it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
