"it" just moved
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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