Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm

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  (313): sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm http://tfl.nu/q0uy
  Replies (10) Good night (2602) Bad night (3360)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.

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  (612): I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks. http://tfl.nu/pli4
  Replies (27) Good night (4109) Bad night (1028)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  i will soon be in a relationship on fb

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  you!?

  (561): View more from Florida

  me and your mom. i mean, lisa.

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  (561): i will soon be in a relationship on fb (919): you!? (561): me and your mom. i mean, lisa. http://tfl.nu/5lvv
  Replies (11) Good night (3293) Bad night (792)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  So can I buy you a drink sometime?

  (206): View more from Washington

  Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.

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  (918): So can I buy you a drink sometime? (206): Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days. http://tfl.nu/hks4
  Replies (28) Good night (1354) Bad night (7869)
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  (626): View more from California

  You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.

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  (626): You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I. http://tfl.nu/6sde
  Replies (9) Good night (7051) Bad night (948)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?

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  (407): the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day? http://tfl.nu/2o1l
  Replies (17) Good night (5760) Bad night (1070)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level

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  (908): I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level http://tfl.nu/uegr
  Replies (11) Good night (5547) Bad night (1455)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.

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  (303): U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up. http://tfl.nu/8u2m
  Replies (3) Good night (1205) Bad night (854)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...

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  (316): Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call... http://tfl.nu/fydz
  Replies (16) Good night (2212) Bad night (780)
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  (002): View more from

  There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink

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  (002): There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink http://tfl.nu/tsjq
  Replies (8) Good night (1862) Bad night (519)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.

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  (505): Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit. http://tfl.nu/8do4
  Replies (5) Good night (1011) Bad night (517)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together

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  (604): I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together http://tfl.nu/pe8s
  Replies (4) Good night (1401) Bad night (472)
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  (650): View more from California

  So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.

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  (650): So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer. http://tfl.nu/8gu5
  Replies (5) Good night (720) Bad night (411)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.

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  (979): The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB. http://tfl.nu/sezq
  Replies (1) Good night (1036) Bad night (294)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I can only rely on you and Taco Bell

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  (205): I can only rely on you and Taco Bell http://tfl.nu/u0ns
  Replies (0) Good night (393) Bad night (204)

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