Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize
