So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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