bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
