is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Randomize
