we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
