We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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