My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.