when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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