Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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