I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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