Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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