This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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