I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize