They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
P.S. I can't hear my feet
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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