I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.