I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
