hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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