yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
