I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
